


The beast in me sleeps with you.

by SilverInStars



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Greek Mythology, Capwolf AU, Comfort/Angst, Coming of Age, M/M, POV Steve Rogers, Prophetic Dreams, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-14
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-06-05 09:39:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15167882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverInStars/pseuds/SilverInStars
Summary: He grows with inaccuracy in Stephanos’ dreams, sometimes a scared child that makes Stephanos ache with familiarity and sometimes an adult who seems to be fighting a war against the whole world.





	The beast in me sleeps with you.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Fluffypanda](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fluffypanda/gifts).



> So the prompt from @Fluffypanda was: Sort of a pantheistic (in the tradition of the greeks and romans, or Tamora Pierce if you like) capwolf au, where Steve became the avatar of a werewolf deity as a young adult via the genre equivalent of project rebirth. As the embodiment of that god he goes into battle for causes he deems worthy on behalf of his temple/followers. Thanks to his status as a literal wolf-headed warrior god, he's distanced from other people, until he meets Tony. 
> 
>  
> 
> I decided to combine that with one of the short prompts "prophetic sex dreams" and while this isn't exactly that, I hope you enjoy the fic anyway ^^
> 
> So I actually ended up going for existing Mythology for the Warrior Gods instead of the pantheistic route, >.<
> 
> The mythology I picked up for this fic is of Lycaon and Zeus. Lycaon was the king of Arcadia, and to test Zeus' omniscience, he served him the roasted flesh of his own son Nyctimus. 
> 
> Zeus punishes him for this by turning him and his sons into wolves.

When Stephanos first dreams, he is just a swaddling baby in his mother’s arms. He dreams in color, of red and gold flying in an iridescent orbit of colors in his mind. He tries to reach out for it, stretches his little arms as far as they will go, but colors always remain just out of his reach. He scrunches up his face, a cry spilling out from his saliva wet mouth. His mother presses him to her breast, shushing him. Sons of Lycaon had to carry their father’s sin and couldn’t be weak babes. She quietens him with a hum, and Stephanos sleeps again, and he dreams of the wonderful things that he cannot yet attain.

As he grows older, Stephanos learns many things. He learns that he is a prince and his father a king. He learns that his father is unkind, _crazed_ , his mother says, her breath warm against his ear in the middle of the night as she wipes her tears on his cheeks. He learns that he is half beast half man. They sleep on luxury, and his mother always holds him close at night, as though she is afraid someone will come take him away.

When the moon is full, his mother ties a rope around his neck and attaches it to their bedpost. Stephanos thinks she is scared of what he becomes, even though she presses her mouth to his fur and tells him she loves him. He wonders if it is possible to love a son who is a beast. Stephanos’ dreams are always more vivid on those nights. He sees things he cannot yet believe, which is surprising to Stephanos because he didn’t believe there was much remaining that could surprise him.

Stephanos has read the books in the libraries, he has participated in the Lycaen games, he has won. Stephanos’ his father is proud of him, though he is not sure how he feels about this pride. So Stephanos keeps his dreams to himself, his father will be proud of those as well, since dreams are a gift from Morpheus, and Stephanos isn’t sure he wants that.

Stephanos goes to his lessons in the morning, an orator comes to give speeches, he talks of the greatness of Lycean minds and teaches Stephanos of thoughts other than his own. Stephanos likes listening to him. But sometimes these thoughts makes him think of his brother Nyctimus, and Stephanos wonders if he wants to unravel the minds of others.

They teach Stephanos how to fight, the man he learns from is gentle but firm. Stephanos is being pitied, he is taught how to parry with a sword and grapple with a beast. A prince must know how to fight, so Stephanos is made strong. When he becomes stronger than all of his brothers and sisters, strong enough to lift a pillar with one arm, his educator puts an arm around his shoulder, and tells Stephanos that in reality his wife is a much better fighter than he is, but in Arcadia the women do not fight.

Stephanos thinks of this, he thinks of Nyctimus and how his mother trembles when they eat with his father. He tells himself he will be stronger yet. He closes his eyes at night, and allows himself to dream. Stephanos never dreams of the same thing, they are ever changing and sometimes move along too quick for Stephanos to catch them. But through his changing dreams there is a constant. Dark hair and brown eyes, Stephanos knows this person with each breath of his soul. He grows with inaccuracy in Stephanos’ dreams, sometimes a scared child that makes Stephanos ache with familiarity and sometimes an adult who seems to be fighting a war against the whole world. His dream apparition is volatile, Stephanos realizes early on. Sometimes he is like a wild child, spinning around and refusing to blend with his surroundings. He is usually like this after an argument with his father, Stephanos has seen them interact in his dreams, boy and man, they do not get along. It is not like Stephanos’ relationship with his father, non-existent due to his mother’s hovering. No the boy, _Anthony_ they call him, he is small in front of his father, with eyes that cry out for attention. Stephanos doesn’t know what that might feel like, he was always taught to disappear into the air when his father was around.

 _Do not speak, and if possible do not move._ His mother would say, and Stephanos listens.

His boy, his Anthony, is brilliant however. Stephanos believes he might be blessed by the Gods themself. He builds things that are well beyond Stephanos’ scope, things that shine, that connect people and then things that soar. Stephanos wakes up from these dreams with his heart pounding, and Stephanos whispers into the dark of the night shrouded by the curtains his mother draws for him, Anthony is beautiful.

When Stephanos comes of age, there is a ceremony. And as his father is congratulating him he says, “Now you will be able to fight our wars, boy” Stephanos feels the heavy weight of his father’s hand on his shoulders, he remembers little Anthony waiting outside a door holding his latest invention in hand, a door that never opens, he remembers this, and then he agrees with his father.

Stephanos doesn’t dislike his beastly form. Despite his mothers complaints, he likes being able to scent her in the air. He likes how the wind feels as it weaves through his fur when he runs, how the soil crunches under his paws. His instincts are sharper, he is an adult now and his mother cannot keep him bound to his room, but Stephanos avoids the routes taken by his father and brothers anyway. Sometimes he feels a twinge of loneliness, a desire for pack, but then Stephanos’ thoughts go to Anthony, alone in his room and dancing to music Stephanos abhors. His laugh is always unadulterated then, head tossed back, and chest expanded to set free the joy bubbling in him. The vision warms him and Stephanos tucks it away in his heart and continues with his run.

Stephanos keeps Anthony, but Anthony has many lovers that move in and  out of his bed. Some of Stephanos’ dreams are of Anthony fucking or being fucked, it always starts with him saying, “Call me Tony,” and it is the name Stephanos moans now that he is alone in his rooms, no more a child, his hands creep under his tunic where the length of him stands firm, he pictures Anthony’s calloused hands as he puts his fingers into his lovers and makes them writhe under him. It makes Stephanos a little jealous as he drags his hand almost painfully tight on his cock. His mouth is open as he moans Anthony’s name again and again wantonly, and wishes those touches were for him, that the delicious words of praise Anthony murmurs into the hair of his lovers were whispered into the shell of Stephanos’ ears. Anthony is very vocal during intercourse, he gasps and pleads like he is receiving blissful pleasure, gyrating his hips with movement that is hypnotic, his taut buttocks clenching and unclenching. Stephanos likes to imagine draping himself along that muscled back, and biting down onto the brown skin of Anthony’s nape. He doesn’t know what Anthony smells like, but his hooded eyes and the cock of his hips tells Stephanos it’s probably a scent that will drive him mad with lust. If he isn’t there already.

Stephanos goes to war as his father wishes, and when he doesn’t return they erect a statue of his half human half wolf form in his honor.

 

\---

 

In his second life, he is Steve, and Steve is not surprised that he has forgotten all but Anthony. Steve goes through the Great Depression dreaming of Tony in fine suits, eating from a table of food that could last Steve a month. Steve doesn’t feel envious however. Zeus still hasn’t forgiven his father, and even though in this life Steve doesn’t remember his family’s sins, he is glad Tony doesn’t suffer. Steve dreams of Tony playing the piano with his mother, the smile on his face is soft. He is still a child yet, and knowing the man he is to become, Steve’s heart aches for the boy he used to be.

Steve wonders about Tony at times, whether he is just a speck from Steve’s lonely imagination. Steve is hungry and there is a war going on. He feels his duty to fight, sometimes there is an echo of a weight on his shoulder and he feels this need intensely. As Tony builds weapons for a country not at war, Steve tries to smuggle himself into the army. The 4F is daunting, but Steve has never learned how to back down, and in the arms of the bullies on the streets, he learns how to stand up once he’s fallen.

In his dreams Tony is a child in a school filled with those much bigger than him. They don’t bully with their fists, but their words cut sharp and Steve wants to reach into his dreams and pull Tony away from them. Tony, his boy, his man, his. Tony is so brilliant that sometimes it hurts Steve to look at him, there is something in his heart that has always known that Tony belongs with him, and despairs as the dreams fade away like sand between his fingers.

Steve meets Erskine who takes a sample of Steve’s blood. He says he might be able to help Steve and then he asks Steve if he has a God he believes in. He tells Steve tales that belong in bar after a bottle is emptied. He tells Steve of Lycaon, and his wolf children. Steve’s blood has what he has been looking for. Steve thinks Erskine might be a stalker, he followed Steve after looking at his medical reports in the local hospital. But then Erskine talks to Steve about his dreams, he dreams of helping Steve achieve greatness. Steve is sure Erskine is crazy, but his head is filled with Tony, and he recalls the nights he spends wheezing in bed, pulling on his cock to residual images of toned forearms and biceps as they lift large pieces of metal and machinery.

The Vita rays burn Steve, and he knows he’s not going to survive. He wants to survive. He thinks of Tony who sings to the robots in his lab late at night, of Tony in front of twin graves holding back tears that don’t know where to fall, of the small, private smile Tony had given Rhodey when the latter had confirmed their friendship with an incredulous “Isn’t it obvious?” Things were never obvious to Tony and Steve is sure he has never considered himself as important to anyone as he is to Steve. So Steve decides he has to live, and he screams life into his pain.

And then Steve remembers.

He remembers the flowers of Arcadia, and standing atop the hill the day Lycosura had been built. He rememberes wanting to share the sights with Anthony, and how he had been too afraid of being disrespectful by calling him Tony. Steve rememberes his wolf, and after centuries he taka's in a breath and allowes himself to sink into the transformation.

Steve feels the loss of Erskine once the attack happens. He thinks, maybe, he had almost considered the man pack for their shared experience with dreams. He is given a shield and a costume, and Steve remembers with a startling clarity, the tears on his mother’s face as she tied him to the bedpost. They hail him a god, a beast no more, and Steve wonders if this is what they call irony.

In his dreams Tony dons his suit of red and gold and flies up and up into the sky. He is still too far away for Steve to reach him and as Steve fights in yet another war he wonders what Tony sees when he soars above them all.

And then Steve is falling, and he sees Tony in a dark cave, being pushed under the water again and again. He sees the hole in his chest, the betrayal splayed across his face as he lies on a cold floor with the man he trusted looming over his head. As the icy water engulfs Steve, he imagines holding Tony through it all, of the hundreds of kisses he has wanted to press onto the man’s skin.

He wonders if the Gods will pity him and let him remember Tony in his next life as well.

 

___

 

Tony is everything Steve dreamed him to be and more. Steve looks at him, at the hard plains of his suit, at Tony’s beautiful eyes and the clean cut of his beard. Steve remembers being seventeen and masturbating to the lingering visions Tony’s face under the covers with the lights off.

He is prettier face to face, and Steve knows he really wants to kiss Tony Stark. Now only if Tony Stark wanted to kiss him back. But Steve is nothing if not determined, and as he jumps out of the quinjet after Tony, he knows he will spend as many years as it takes, following the red and gold home.

 


End file.
